Barry "Bail" Bonds

According to Yahoo!, Barry Lamar Bonds, faces two and a half years on charges stemming from apparent lies told to the court by Bonds when he faced steroid allegations. This guy for sure did steroids. He is the biggest dog and that's why he is getting the brunt of this whole thing. Everyone did steroids then, had the players not did steroids, baseball's ratings would've plummeted even more due to lack of interest. The roid heads came to the rescue hitting bomb after bomb, bringing interest back to the sport, therefore selling more advertisement to big name sponsors and baseball flourished. The league is to blame, not the players. They wanted money and they new what was going on. It was up to the commish and his posse to correct the problem at first glance instead of turning their collective heads when the problem could have been solved right away. Sorry Barry, you got the record you wanted, but now you're gonna have a record you don't want, a criminal record.

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Back to School

Here at the SportsToilet you have heard us talk good and bad about Court Jester James( thanks THirsh.) But I wanted to bring up a story that broke earlier today from the Bohemian king and former laker Michael Thompson on the radio. A few nights back Lebron went out with his crew to a nice restaurant in Cleveland(if they even exist there). Court Jester and his crew wined and dinned throughout the evening keeping the waiter and staff there until 4am that morning. The bill came out to 800 bucks and Lebron, being the gentleman we all think he is, LeBronn decided to pick up the bill. What he did was embarrass himself and humiliated the waiter. LeBron signed the bill and gave the guy a 10 dollar tip! I mean all the witnesses and LeBron himself noticed the bill and purposely gave the waiter 10 dollars. The poor waiter was up all night and one of the richest mo fo's alive treats him like a peasant. When Lebron was asked about this, he said he read the bill wrong. Maybe he should have went to school for a year or maybe he should learn how to read.

Let's compare this to a great Laker dinner that was held a local Melrose hotspot last week. First off Kobe Bryant was with all his teammates. Take note, Lebron. They wined and dined for a bill of about 2,000 bucks. When the bill came the team began to chant MVP, MVP, MVP and within seconds Kobe flips his Black Card to the waitress to gladly pay for the meal. Kobe then tipped the young lady that was providing the meal for the evening a nice amount and provided her a lasting memory of the warrior we know as Kobe Bryant. Mr.James, meet Mr.Bryant and learn what it takes to have class on every level of life.

Jordan, "The Shoe"

I found this documentary on Webcastr. This gives great insight on Nike's emergence into the basketball market and how the Jordan shoes snowballed into the phenomenon it is today. MJ'S, J's, Jordans, Air Mike's, 23's, Air Steps, whatever you call them, this is the skinny on the fattest shoe of all time.
This is a must watch if you have ten minutes..."You don't wear "Air Jordans" in the winter."

I think Mars Blackmon was right. It's gotta be the shoes.
Check the video out HERE

Wake up, Mr. West, Mr. West

Ladies and gentleman, the sportstoilet would like to introduce Mr. Fundamental 2.0. Tonight Tim Duncan literally got the nickname taken from him. Its like the 1995 Playoffs when David Robinson won the MVP award, and Hakeem Olajuwon proceeded to dominate him and be hailed as MVP after the playoffs. David West used a variety of smooth jumpshots, head fakes and pump fakes inside, as well as crafty spin moves and use of the rim to get his shot off against taller opponents inside.

Mr West actually reminded me of Tim Duncan 3 or 4 years ago when if you backed off a step he’d bank if off the glass and if you doubled inside he’d either find an open teammate or lay in anyway. David West’s line tonight, try 38 points on 16-25 shooting, with 14 rebounds, 5 assists, 5 blocks, and 2 steals for good measure. He even went 6-7 from the line, and spent stretches of the game guarding Timmy in single coverage and doing a nice job. Everyone lately has been calling CP3 the next coming at the point, but his pick and rolls and pick and pops would not be nearly as deadly without West coming off the screen and without Peja at the 3 point line and Chandler ready for the lob. In fact in the half court set, West’s ability to create his own shots and shots for others has truly been what has taken ‘Nawlins to the next level. Just to give you an idea, take a look at David West's career stats and see how much he has improved every year.

What makes West, Mr. Fundamental 2.0 is that he is also an emotional leader and catalyst for his ball club. In the first round, instead of getting intimidated by the more experienced Dallas Mavericks, he love tapped Dirk Nowitzki in the face and got in the German's head, before outplaying him and then eliminating them from the playoffs. I think one could argue that he deserves either Jamison's or Bosh's spot on the Olympic team this summer.

As for the series I think San Antonio will be able to hold serve at home in a very close one, and New Orleans finally gives them the old flush in game seven.

Introducing Florida Baseball

Florida low payroll baseball is the way to go these days. Lets start with the Tampa Bay Rays. Yes folks, get it right, it is no longer the Tampa Bay Devil Rays. They have shed a new coat and losing is not a part of their new look. As you notice the highly competitive AL East standings after tonight's action you don't see a familiar sight. Its not the Yankees or the Red Sox in first. It is not the surging Blue Jays with maybe the best pitching staff in baseball thats #1. Your first place team is none other than your Rays. Let's talk about why this team has restored order to those who attend their games at Tropicana Field. And yes this OJ is fresh. This Rays team has depth at every position. The outfield consists of a consistent Carl Crawford, an up and coming BJ Upton and a veteran in Eric Hinske in right. Even their backups are legit. They have Cliff Floyd to come in and turn on pitches and send them over the right field wall. Then we have Johnny Gomes and Rocco Baldelli riding the pine ready to contribute. Their infield is really turning into something special as well. Along with one of my potential Rookie of the Year candidates Evan Longoria-Parker making a move, the infield is holding strong. The real difference as usual in baseball is pitching. More importantly a ferocious player and Fontana, CA local you know as Troy Percival. As a member of the Orange County Angels he brought fear to hitters when they approached the plate. Percival has inspired these young Ray's pitchers to become major leaguers. We at the sportstoilet know some growing pains will come down the road in the season but for once its nice to see those Tampa kids atop those standings...More to come from JAR live at the game tomorrow.





Over in what we know as the National League/Pitchers bat division the Florida Marlins are quietly standing atop the NL East. Lets start by saying the Fish made one of the best moves in baseball over the last 6 months by re-signing Hanley Ramirez for a 7 year deal at 70 million. Mark it down SportsToilet readers, this move was brilliant.The Florida Marlins always seem to bring in the right veterans to play with their always abundant group of youngsters. Chemistry is everything in sports and the Marlins seem to always have the right medication. Dan Uggla for instance. This guy was part of the Rule 5 draft and taken by the Arizona Diamondbacks in round 400. The Marlins loved the kid so they offered Arizona 50 grand for his rights and signed him. Good move to say the least.With young pitchers like Anibal Snachez, Sergio Mitre, Scott Olsen and two sport athlete Mark Hendrickson, this team will be in the race come October. We also seem to forget how the Fish traded their superstars Miguel Cabrera and Dontrelle Willis just this past December. I think the Marlins won that trade with these youngsters that they acquired building a foundation for Marlin baseball for years to come. Look for Cameron Maybin to be called up in the near future and really make an impact when they call his number. Also look for the Fish to add a veteran power hitter come trade deadline to make a push for the pennant or the wildcard.

A Plan for the Clippers

This is sad. Ok, to start I want to preface by saying in no way do I care about the Los Angeles Clippers, I'm an LA guy, and if you're a real LA guy, it's Purple and gold or bust. I tried to find an image for The Clippers on Google and the majority of the pictures were sailboats and haircutting utensils. I swear try it. I hate this team one through twelve. I hate the coach. I hate the owner. I love the area and I love the GM (Elgin Baylor) as a player, not as a GM. This is the most pathetic franchise in sports. They are not even able to qualify as the Lakers' NBDL team most seasons and this year was a prime example. They draft bad, they are all injury prone and they sign veterans who are past their prime, they are a lot like the Dodgers in that sense, it hurts me to say that, trust me. This is what will probably happen this off-season: They will lose Maggette and Brand, Shaun Livingston will get injured again, which I hope doesn't happen because I actually like him and they will draft some guy name Zaargaanusius Morocaragodzadian, some import from Indo-China or Armenia who won't be ready to play for 3 more years when his rookie contract is up.
Attention: Elgin Baylor, Mike Dunleavy, Donald Sterling!!! I'll give you a hint on the off-season, pay attention, it's your only chance.
First objective, keep Elton Brand, he is the only irreplaceable guy on your team. He's the only one who plays with heart on your team or a brain for that matter.
Second, lock up Caveman Kaman for a long time, he's developing into a rebounding and shot blocking machine plus he has nice touch off the glass and works well in that crap offense you run.
Third, let Maggette go and do whatever it take to bring back one of the LA born superstar free agents, Gilbert "I fill" Arenas or Baron Davis. They can both run the point at a high level, they can both distribute the ball and dish it out in bunches and they are both Southland Legends.
Fourth, draft well, this shouldn't be too tough, I see 5 studs in the first 5 picks. Don't look at the draft projection, if you fall in the top 5, you have 5 options: Derrick Rose, Michael Beasely, OJ Mayo, Jerryd Bayless, or Eric Gordon. Don't trade down, just take any of these guys. All of them are solid guys, OJ has character issues but they can be solved now that all the gifts are given over the table. Bayless would love to run with the fellow Wildcat Gilbert Arenas, and would even play the 2 and learn from one of the game's best. Gordon, is a thirsty young baller who can drain any shot, D-Up and run the point if needed. He's fast and rebounds, something most guards shy away from. Beasely and Rose speak for themselves. If the Clippers get pick one or two, they are all set. DO NOT! draft "Brenda, I mean" Brooke Lopez, he's as soft as puppy crap and and will just be another Clipper big man bust.
Fifth, trade or sign for a great shooting small forward like a Kyle Korver or Sasha Vujacic type, Brent Barry is still available too. This will solidify the starting lineup and spread the floor for Your new superstar point guard to go to work. I'd also make a run at Eduardo Najera, a solid defender off the bench and great rebounder.
Now if you listened to me this could be your lineup:
Gilbert Arenas-Derrick Rose-Al Thornton-Elton Brand-Chris Kaman...good start right?
You will have Shaun Livingston, Eduardo Najero, Tim Thomas, Cutino Mobley, Dan Dickau and Smush "Well I don't really count in Teddy's argument" Parker coming off the bench. This no longer sounds like a dead last team to me.
Lastly, get the fuck out of LA, you are not wanted here. You are the shitty younger brother that can never win. Guess what? I heard Anaheim is a great sports town and no one plays basketball there yet...Or San Diego, I heard they have room to build and it was your first California home....Maybe Mexico city, it's just like LA without the beaches.
I know you will not read this,so I know you have no chance in 09, but if you do do something along these lines, you may improve drastically.
In closing, I would like to quote Ving Rhames in Pulp Fiction, in reference to the Clippers current standing in the Staples Center,"Your LA privileges are over."

Expect Great?

I can't believe I'm putting something up about the WNBA, but I just couldn't resist. For those of you watching the Playoffs, you probably have seen the new commercial and slogan for the WNBA. If not, here it is:




Here's how The Jar sees the dialogue:

"I'm sorry you couldn't pay me to watch women's bball." Yes.

"Nothing exciting ever happens." Yes.

"What kind of future does the WNBA have? None that I can see." Yes.

This women has just said everything that the Sports Toilet has been saying since day 1. I really couldn't have said it any better myself. The commercial goes on to tell viewers that they can Expect Great; the new slogan that the league of women that you would not want to see naked is running with this season. Piggybacking on the NBA's Where Amazing Happens which is signifcantly better and more appealing. Of course the WNBA is infinitely less appealing in principal. Still I think that slogan pinpoints the problem with women's basketball. That's the peak...great. Writers of the Sports Toilet go to the blacktop every week and expect great. We watch sports to witness spectaculor plays by atheletes who can do things that we will never do. Most atheletes can do the same things as a WNBA player. Anybody who has had to suffer through highlights of the WNBA would know that, and would know that the play isn't even that great.

Phil Jackson Wants Ariza's Return to Motivate Radmanovic

"We'll just see what he can do. Vlade's not played well in the last two games," Phil Jackson said, referring to Vladimir Radmanovic, the Lakers' starting small forward. "[Ariza] plays that position. We'll see if Vlade can't right his game here.”’

Knowing Phil Jackson and his mind games, letting Ariza practice really might be his way of motivating Radmanovic, rather than really expecting Ariza to play after 3 months out. We all know that Vlade is a feast or famine three point shooter, but late in the season he has showed flashes of great passing and defensive energy. With any momentum Luke Walton had literally being blocked by backup Jazz point guard, Ronnie Price near the end of game 4, Dr. Phil needed another player to push the effort level of Radmanovic.

Ariza, the best perimeter defender other than Kobe on the Lakers, could be helpful in the upcoming rounds if he is able to return. If the Lakers do win the series versus the Jazz they will face either Spurs or Hornets in the next round which will mean either Tony Parker-Longoria or CP3. While Fisher has done a great job defending Deron Williams, Fisher plays better against bigger guards than the lightning quick guards they may face next round. Ariza just may be the factor that puts the Lakers into the finals. If nothing else, he may just push Vlade to be the player we need to win upcoming games.

Ariza Cleared for Takeoff

After many months of recovery the Los Angeles Times is reporting that Trevor Ariza has been cleared to return and practice without any restrictions. Timing is everything. Just when you thought Kobe was a bit banged up the Lakers get the good word that Ariza is ready to roll. Let's give another shout out for Mitch Kupchak pulling this trade off back in Novemeber. When we heard it from Steve Hartman's mouth on the radio that great day, we would soon begin to find out why this UCLA star wanted to come back to L.A. so badly. He was an immediate impact on the team injecting some much needed juice and energy to the line up. When the "Space Cadet" also known as Vlad Radmonivic went to sleep Trevor was there. When Luke Walton was injured, Trevor was there. So from all of us here at the SportsToilet, we welcome you back. Now start turning that Jazz team out of tune. Check out his dunk over a fellow NBA'er...

English Arch Rivals Battle for Champions League

Next Wednesday, May 21st is the day Chelsea and Manchester United meet at Luzhniki Stadium in Moscow to see who will be this year’s European Champion. Chelsea has some of the biggest names in the planet on their roster thanks to Russian billionaire owner Roman Abramovich. He spares no expense when it comes to acquiring his coveted players. However the recent injuries of Captain John Terry and striker Didier Drogba have Chelsea fans worried about their top players’ status for the big game. The coaching staff seems to think the players will be there. But the shoulder injury sustained by Terry seemed very serious and I for one don’t see it fully healing by game time. Manchester United has its share of great players and they will be overly energized given their achievement of this year’s Premiere League Championship. Lets not forget that the Manchester side also has Sir Alex Ferguson; one of the greatest coaches ever.
Questions still remain: will Abramovich’s status in Russia cause some unfair leverage in favor of his Chelsea team? (I’ve witnessed shadier things happen)Will a 50 year anniversary of the Munich Crash which took the lives of eight Manchester players be a strong incentive for the United side to come out even more motivated? (Highly doubtful) Will Manchester United be able to repeat what they did in 1999 when they won the Premiere League and Champions League in the same year? Only time will tell, however my pick is for Manchester United to come out victorious. I think Ryan Giggs nearing the end of his career, knowing he was only able to reach this title once; must be able to motivate his side to do it for him. That and having Cristiano Ronaldo, the leading scorer so far in this Champions League, should be enough for Manchester United to come out victorious in the first all English Final of the Champions League.